Roasts are witty, humorous, or savage remarks aimed at teasing someone in a playful or sometimes brutally honest way. Popular in comedy and casual banter, roasts can be clean, clever, or cutting. Whether you’re roasting your best friend, a coworker, or just looking for good comebacks online, the art of roasting has become a universal form of entertainment.
In this article, we’ll break down different types of roasts, their impact, and share 45 good roasts that hurt (but in a funny way). You’ll also get tips on how to deliver roasts with style and timing — all backed by authority and creativity.
Why People Love Roasts
Roasting is more than just poking fun. It’s a form of social bonding, especially when done right. It works in:
- Comedy shows
- Social media memes
- Friendly gatherings
- School/college banter
- Office humor
Roasts are memorable because they blend humor with truth. A perfect roast hits the spot — it’s not too offensive, yet not too mild.
Types of Roasts
Before diving into the best roasts list, let’s explore the types of roasts:
1. Funny Roasts
Lighthearted and clever without being cruel.
“Everyone is so delighted when you leave the room.”
2. Savage Roasts
Sharp, brutal, and not for the faint-hearted.
“No, that is the third one down. You have something on your chin.”
3. Clean Roasts
Safe for all audiences — perfect for school or work.
“You’re like a cloud. When you disappear, it’s a beautiful day.”
4. Intellectual Roasts
Smart burns using wit and wordplay.
“I hope it is not contagious, but you seem to be thinking about something.”
45 Good Roasts That Hurt (But in a Hilarious Way)
Here’s your ultimate list of 45 best roasts — funny, clean, and savage. Use responsibly.
Funny Roasts:
- You simply think poorly; you are not stupid.
- You bring everyone happiness — when you go away.
- If you were any slower, you’d be in reverse.
- You’re like a software update — unnecessary and always badly timed.
- Something is on your face. Well, that is only your face, so do not worry.
- Shampoo bottles now have warning labels because of you.
- If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive.
- You have something on your shoulders… oh right, that’s your head.
- You don’t need a GPS — you’re already lost in life.
- You make onions cry.
Savage Roasts:
- You’re proof evolution can go in reverse.
- Your secrets are safe with me since I don’t listen.
- You’re like a broken pencil — pointless.
- You have something between your ears, but it’s not a brain.
- Your only talent is wasting people’s time.
- I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
- Your face makes onions cry out of pity.
- I would be broke if I had a $1 for every wise thing you uttered.
- The only thing you run is your mouth.
- You’re like a cloud — full of hot air and blocking the sunshine.
Clean Roasts:
- You provide so much delight — but not to me.
- You’re the human version of a participation trophy.
- You are not particularly attractive, but you are also not particularly photogenic.
- You have something special — just not in a good way.
- You were born for greatness… just not today.
- You remind me of a software bug — persistent and annoying.
- You have the energy of a dial-up connection.
- You light up the room… by leaving it.
- You make a tree stump look sharp.
- You’re the reason pencils have erasers.
Quick One-Liner Roasts:
- You are merely very determined to do nothing; you are not lazy.
- Your Wi-Fi signal is stronger than your personality.
- You talk a lot — but say nothing.
- You bring the average IQ down in every room you enter.
- You’re as useful as a submarine’s screen door.
- You’re the dictionary definition of “why tho?”
- You could be a model… for “before” pictures.
- Your brain functions similarly to a web browser, with 17 tabs frozen and 19 open.
- You were born to stand out — like a sore thumb.
- If being annoying was a job, you’d be CEO.
Bonus Roasts (Extra Zingers):
- If common sense were a superpower, you’d be powerless.
- You’re like a selfie taken with the front camera — unexpected and terrifying.
- You make slow internet look fast.
- I’d explain it to you, but I left my crayons at home.
- If your life was a movie, it would be a silent film — without subtitles.
How to Use Roasts Responsibly
Roasting can go wrong if it becomes hurtful instead of humorous. Always know your audience. Here are a few dos and don’ts:
✅ Do:
- Use roasts among friends who understand the humor
- Keep it clean in public or workplace settings
- Match the roast to the situation
❌ Don’t:
- Roast someone sensitive or in a vulnerable state
- Use roasts to bully or offend intentionally
- Mix humor with personal trauma or insecurities
Why Roasting is a Skill
Believe it or not, delivering a roast well takes skill. Timing, tone, and context all matter. Some of the world’s top comedians use roasts as part of their routine — but it’s not just about being mean. It’s about being clever, quick-witted, and observant.
FAQs: Roasts and Savage Comebacks
What are some good roasts?
Good roasts are witty insults that are funny and clever without being too offensive. Examples include:
“You’re like a cloud. When you disappear, it’s a beautiful day.”
What are good roasts?
Good roasts are those that hit the right balance between humor and sting. They should leave people laughing, not crying.
What are the best roasts?
The best roasts often come from personal observation. Some examples:
“You are not stupid; all you have is bad luck in your thinking.” You are useless, like a abroken pencil.”
What are some roasts?
Here’s a quick list:
- “You make onions cry.”
- “You bring everyone joy… when you leave.”
Final Thoughts
Roasting is a time-tested way to spice up conversation and share a laugh. Whether you’re looking for good roasts, funny burns, or roasts that hurt just right, the key is to keep it witty, timely, and never personal. With the right roast, you don’t just insult — you entertain.
So next time you want to clap back with style, remember: a great roast doesn’t just sting — it makes people laugh.
